Tips In Parenting Through Adolescence
Adolescence is that period in a person’s life when everything is a question and nothing is sure. This is the time when our kids try to determine who they are and what they would like to be in the future.
For people who are still undergoing many changes in their lives, from the physical component to social aspects of their daily lives, this period can be really tough especially when they have no one to turn to who can understand them and who can guide them in their journey of self-discovery.
It is in this period in their lives that children need their parents the most (excluding of course the formative years when children are totally dependent on their parents!). They need the support and the reassurance that everything will right itself at the right time.
Unfortunately, kids do not often have such support from their parents, especially from those who are working to earn a living. In today’s society when both parents are working, guidance has become so nil and is often relegated to the peer group. This can be a major problem especially if the members of the peer group are also undergoing the same confusing things. It will be just a case of the blind leading the blind.
Working and earning a living is however not an excuse in parenting. One can guide children even without too much time in their hands. They just have to make it a point to spend those few extra hours with their children and talk. Quantity is actually not an issue but the quality of time that you spend with them.
Below are some ways to look after your child’s welfare without sacrificing your work.
1. Reserve one day every week
Make it a point to allot one free time for your children every week. Do things together. Go out and just relax. Not only will this help them get comfortable with you, this will also foster an environment where telling secrets and confiding is easer. Spending one day with you will also strengthen your bond with them. In addition, this will also lessen the time that they will spend with their peer group.
2. Be open
One of the problems why teenagers do not confide or share problems with their parents is their fear of being rejected or lectured. And because confiding and telling problems is not really a family practice or tradition within the fold, some are shy to open up, thinking that they will not be entertained or not taken seriously. This is especially true if they are dealing with problems that they cannot understand or make sense of. Thinking that it is not normal to feel such things, they will not open up and just try to figure the puzzle out on their own.
3. Don’t be too strict
Most teenagers would want to ask permission when they go out with their friends or try something new. Most kids would like their parents to know what they have been doing with their time. Most kids like to but the problem is they don’t. This oftentimes happen when teenagers feel or think that their parents will not let them or forbid them.
Make your teenager understand that you will let them do whatever they want as long as they tell you what it is. Set some boundaries but make sure that they understand that you appreciate their honesty more than anything else.